Sunday, April 29, 2012

Why Obesity And Gluttony Is Good For The Economy

Here are some of the top reasons for why gluttony and obesity is GOOD for the economy.

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We fatlings are the biggest consumers of food!

We fatling eat more -- A LOT MORE. we are 73% of the population and we eat 90% of the food. If we were to all eat at the levels of thinglings food consumption in the US would be cut by at least 70%. This would devastate the junk food industry. If every fatling reformed there would be massive layoffs in the fast food and junk food industry.



We fatlings are the biggest consumers of fuel. 

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You won't catch any self respecting fatling driving a Toyota Prius or a Smart Car. We drive vans and Escalades. Hell many of us can't fit in some compact puddle jumper and besides fat people like to ride in style.


We fatlings are the biggest consumers of health care.

Without our obesity induced maladies the health care industry be a shadow of what it is today.  Giant diagnostic imaging machines would become obsolete. The manufacturers of bariatric gurneys and beds, diabetes, and C-PAP supplies would see their business shrink are the waistlines of Americans shrink.

Cardiologists and their suppliers would take a huge hit.

Orthopedic surgeons would take a hit. Joint replacement sales would plummet.

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Joe the Plumber would become unemployed.

As we fatlings know all too well many double and triple flushers just won't go down the crapper and frequently we need to call Joe the plumber to stop by and work his magic.



Fatlings shit bigger turds and big turds clog toilets. Clogged toilets require the skills of  guys like Joe the Plumber.



The clothing industry would suffer.

If the X-L - 4X-L sizes were to vanish the clothing industry would lose half its jobs.

The end of obesity would signal a bigger economic collapse since the great depression and the Bush depression combined!







10 comments:

  1. Good evening Fat Bastard!!!

    Well, today was a really great day for me! Yeah! I had are really really really great day!

    OK, first, as usual, I took the bus up to Albertsons to get some groceries, then I went to Walgreens to get some cigars, and then, instead of taking the bus back to the down town terminal, I decided to ride on my JAZZY Power Chair (that I use to get around outdoors because of the arthritis in my knees and ankles) down Mesa Street and stopped off at Starbucks for some dark roast coffee.

    Hey! I want to thank Starbucks for supporting marriage equality!

    Then I rode down Oregon street to the Plaza Park down town.

    There was a gathering of about 50 people there with protest signs, flags, and banners. It was the 99% Percent, Occupy El Paso group. I listened to a speech. Our group was protesting against the huge tax breaks for big corporations, and against the banks.

    First we had a picnic, tamales, cupcakes, and fresh fruit, and then we gathered together for the protest march around the downtown area.

    I was asked if I wouldn't mind carrying one of their big flags, and I said yes, I would be delighted! I was given a large rainbow flag that said PEACE in white letters. Since it was a rather large flag on a heavy pole, it was easier for me to carry while sitting in my JAZZY Power Chair.

    Oh! And by the way, the rainbow flag is not just a symbol of gay rights, it symbolizes ALL progressive progressive movements!

    So, we marched around CHASE BANK, then around BANK OF AMERICA, and around WELLS FARGO, carrying our protest signs and banners, shouting our slogans against the big corporations and the corrupt banking system.

    Yeah, all the corporate stooges stood out in front the banks in their suits and ties, giving us dirty looks, but we continued on our peaceful march.

    Oh! And there were no cops around!

    For all I know, some of the protesters might have been off-duty cops in plane clothes. Yes, most cops are members of unions, so our protest march was for their benefit as well, since they are also union members, along with teachers, and business employees.

    Yeah, I remember last year, in the state of Wisconsin, when teachers and employees were on strike protesting in the streets. The Republican Governor of Wisconsin wanted to authorize the police to use deadly force against the protesters.

    But the police refused. Yes, they stood by to maintain order, but refused to use deadly force against peaceful protestors. In fact, some off-duty cops in plane clothes even joined the protestors because they are also union members.

    But, during our Occupy El Paso protest march, there were no fuzzy-wuzzys around, not unless some were off duty and in plane clothes.

    Anyway . . . . . It was fun! I had a great time today!

    . . . to be continued . . .

    ReplyDelete
  2. . . . continued from above . . .

    After the march was over, we came back to the Plaza Park. Then we sang, "Blowing In The Wind" you know, the answer my friend is blowing in the wind. At first, we kind of started off key, but when I joined in they followed my lead, because I had the strongest voice.

    I was asked if I ever had singing lessons, and I said, no, I use to sing in the Karaokes. One of them even said I have a voice like an opera singer. Well, I was the fattest person in the crowd, and I have always had a strong singing voice. Yeah, large people do have bigger voices.

    Then, we gathered around the alligator fountain in the Plaza Park, and we sat round talking, discussing various issues.

    We got on the subject of education, especially science education in our schools. Of course, I had to go on one of my usual rants about the Republicans, and how they want to force their Creationist fairy tales in to high school science classes.

    Hey! I got some cheers and hand claps for that!

    When I had mentioned how our dear sweet Governor Rick Perry allowed an innocent man to be executed because he rejected the DNA evidence which proved he was not at the scene of the crime, one of the people in our group said, that Rick Perry should be charged with a crime.

    Yeah! I got to speak my mind today in front of a group of about 20 people, and they listened, and they said I was right on!!

    We're nobody special. We're just plane ordinary everyday people, with plane ordinary jobs, and some of us unemployed, and some even homeless, and, they too, I found to be more intelligent than the the Republicans who are running this country.

    Being 60 years old, I was probably the oldest person there, so, the younger people in there 20s got interested in what I had to say, concerning education.

    Someone even asked if I had been a teacher, and I just said, I'm a nobody. I'm nothing. I'm just some poor schmuck who loves to read books and I support science education.

    I didn't want to go into a lot of details. There wasn't time anyway. I only wanted to say what I felt needed to be said.

    I had mentioned that I subscribe to MoveOn.org, Texas Freedom Network, People For The American Way, Secular Coalition, Union of Concerned Scientists, CFI Center For Inquiry, etc. etc. and every day, on average I sign about 20 to 30 petitions on line.

    Everyone there had something to say in our little group, so everyone got his or her chance to say something.

    Then it was starting to get late, so, we all went our separate ways when it was time to leave and go home, or where-ever.

    While I was riding on my JAZZY power chair on the way home, this black guy asked if I had a cigarette, and I said, no, I didn't have any cigarettes, so I gave him one of my cigars.

    Then I said, GIVE THE MAN A CIGAR!!!

    Anyway . . .

    It was about 7:00 PM when I came home.

    Yeah! I had a really great time today.

    Gee! Politics can be fun!

    Yeah! I'm a real political animal!

    ReplyDelete
  3. . . . continued from above . . .

    Yeah! I'm a real political animal!

    A big fat bear riding on a donkey!

    And, I can kick any elephant's ass!

    Well, I actually can't kick that high because my belly gets in the way, but I can kick an elephant in the lower-leg.

    Anyway, I had a really great day today.



    Teddy Bear

    ReplyDelete
  4. WOWEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

    I am so fucking proud of you you fat man! More of us fatties need to join OWS. Our sheer bulk will make the crowds look bigger.

    I with I could have seen you on your mighty steed (Jazzy Power Chair) hoisting that banner freedom liberty and justice as the protestors fought to free us from the yoke of corporate tyranny with you Teddy Bear leading the charge. I, Fat Bastard and dismayed that the fatosphere has ignored this and not formed a coalition with other civil rights groups.

    It sounds like you added a lot to the protest and I am sure that they were happy to have a person of your stature there. You are not only book smart you are smart smart and you have that professorial look and BEARing.

    I wish I had been there. I would have lead a chorus of loud and angry oinks at those greedy banksters. I would have liked to have left a big Fat Bastard turd in their banks.

    What we need to do is follow them home. As you know many right wing militias have joined OWS and I suspect they have plans to take out a few of the top tyrants. This really is not a left vs right issue. It is right vs wrong.

    America thanks you and I thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  5. One more thing....

    Can you imagine what it would be like if 1000 fatling and others showed up in power chairs and blocked roads and sidewalks. It would be like the cavalry swooping in. They could blow air horns carry megaphones.

    Following the cavalcade of power chairs would be normalings with signs and video cameras.

    Following them would be paramilitary types with guns in case the cops start something they shouldn't.

    We need to bring these creeps to their knees. We have the power to fight the power.

    Bringing up the rear would be ambulatory fatlings waddling and looking menacing.

    ReplyDelete
  6. ... and another thing. Rick Perry needs to come out of the closet. Putting innocent people to death is not going to make him "ungay". He should come out and call himself the Texas Rump Ranger or the Texas Tonsil Jockey.

    I'm glad they got to hear you sing. I think that everyone knows by know that fat singers are the best singers ie Pavarotti, Meat Loaf, Wynnona, Ruben (the sandwich stud) Studdard, Barry White, Luther Vandross, Ann Wilson, Susan Boyle, BB King, John Popper, and the list goes on.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I have said it once, and I will say it again.

    Fat protestors are better than skinny protestors. There are several reasons for this:
    1) Fat people can be louder. As body mass increases, a person is capable of louder voices.
    2) Fat people take up more space. This makes a crowd of us seem like more people than there really are, inflating the numbers and therefore making the protest gain popularity.
    3) Fat people are harder to arrest.

    Let me explain that last one. I, Belly Boy, have reached a unique state. I am incapable of being handcuffed. The handcuffs will not fit because my arms cannot go that close together. It also doesn't work if you handcuff the handcuffs together, you would need a set of three handcuffs to cuff me - one on each hand, and then connect those together with a third set of handcuffs. However, this defeats the purpose since I can still move my arms about freely like this.

    And when we're talking about zip-ties, it just gets unrealistic. Also, loading up the wagons full of fatties is next to impossible. This means that there is less likely to be a mass arrest of fat people who are peacefully protesting, compared to skinny protestors who can easily be rounded up.

    As people of size, it is our job to stand up for the little guy, to some extent.

    Skinny bankers have been ruining our economy. We need more fat bankers to take back control of the financial industry. Fat bankers aren't concerned with drugs and fast cars - instead, they like to support the arts, fine dining, and education. They also don't believe in cheating investors or making risky loans, compared to skinny bankers. We need to fatten up Wall Street by loading them up with plenty of juicy cheeseburgers so that they will fall into line.

    BELLY BOY

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Great points!

      We are louder! We have great voices.

      Ceasar wanted his senators to be fat. The ones with that lean and hungry look killed him. We need to fatten up these banksters so that won't be so hungry for money and instead think more about food. I never looked at it that way but the fact is Belly Boy you are correct. Fatlings are content and wise.

      Delete
  8. Bigger Fatter Politics is the best blog bar none!

    ReplyDelete
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