Friday, November 30, 2012

Fat Bastard's Fat Friendly 13 Days of Christmas For Fatlings & Gluttons


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Christmas is the most vulgar and gluttonous days of the year and that is why we fatlings love it. The very symbol of Christmas is a fat man who spends the whole night going from house to house and eating cookies. This make Christmas the fat friendliest holiday of them all. OINK! It's a glorious celebration of greedy gluttony


$easons Greedings From Bigger Fatter Politics

Keeping with holiday tradition I, Fat Bastard would like to present to our readers my fat friendly version of the Twelve Thirteen Days of Christmas My True Love Gave to Me. As our many millions of readers worldwide know, my true love is food so I decided to rewrite this traditional holiday classic to be more glutton and fat friendly. I hope you enjoy this along with your figgy pudding and sugar plums as you celebrate this most greedy and gluttonous time of year...... OINK!


The Twelve Days of Christmas
By Fat Bastard

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On the first day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
A partridge in a pear sauce.

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On the second day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Two Doves chocolate bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce.

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On the third day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Three French ticklers,
Two Doves chocolate bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce.

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_GuMs4q6RNOY/Sc1D0gxdVLI/AAAAAAAABzM/Zcj8CNG5Shw/s400/Apple+Pie.jpg
On the fourth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Four apple pies,
Three French ticklers,
Two Dove chocolate bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce.


On the fifth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Five golden Ring Ding Jrs,
Four apple pies,
Three French pastries and French ticklers,
Two  Dove chocolate bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce
.
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On the sixth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Six geese a-cooking,
Five golden Rings Ding Jr's,
Four apple pies,
Three French ticklers,
Two Dove chocolate bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce.




On the seventh day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Seven sluts a-swimming,
Six geese a-cooking,
Five golden Ring Ding Jrs,
Four apple pies,
Three French pastries,
Two  Dove chocolate bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce.



On the eighth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Eight maids with Milk Duds,
Seven sluts a-swimming,
Six geese a-cooking,
Five golden Ring Ding Jrs,
Four apple pies,
Three French pastries,
Two Dove Chocolate Bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce.


On the ninth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Nine fat lezzies licking,
Eight maids with Milk Duds,
Seven sluts a-swimming,
Six geese a-cooking,
Five golden Ring Ding Jrs,
Four apple pies,
Three French pastries,
Two Dove Chocolate bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce.

http://www.dccentralkitchen.org/images/news/blackHistoryChef-lg.jpg
On the tenth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Ten chefs a-chefin,
Nine Lezzies licking,
Eight maids with Milk Duds,
Seven sluts a-swimming,
Six geese a-cooking,
Five golden Ring Ding Jrs,
Four apple pies,
Three French pastries,
Two Dove chocolate bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce.

http://www.karlklockars.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/fatbastard0509.jpg
On the eleventh day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Eleven pipers pissing,
Ten Chefs a-cheffin,
Nine lezzies licking,
Eight maids with Milk Duds,
Seven sluts a-swimming,
Six geese a-cooking,
Five golden Ring Ding Jr,
Four apple pies,
Three French pastries,
Two Dove chocolate bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce.

http://www.kalakokua.com/drums_hibachi.jpg
On the twelfth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Twelve deep fried drumsticks,
Eleven pipers pissing,
Ten chefs a cheffin,
Nine lezzies licking,
Eight maids with Milk Duds,
Seven sluts a-swimming,
Six geese a-cooking,
Five golden Rings Ding Jrs,
Four apple pies,
Three French pastries,
Two Dove Chocolate bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce!




On the thirteenth day of Christmas,
My true love sent to me,
Thirteen pigs a-OINKING,
Twelve deep fried drumsticks,
Eleven pipers pissing,
Ten chefs a cheffin,
Nine lezzies licking,
Eight maids with Milk Duds,
Seven sluts a-swimming,
Six geese a-cooking,
Five golden Rings Ding Jrs,
Four apple pies,
Three French ticklers and pastries,
Two Dove Chocolate bars,
And a partridge in a pear sauce!

Now that you are drooling over all the food, sluts and fat lezzies see more holiday food, recipes and hot fat sluts and lezzies HERE!

  Fat Bastard and Proud FA wishing you a Merry XXX-Mas and a Happy New Year!

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Ooops! I almost forgot Thinnete and her HOT cousin Skinny Linny

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3 comments:

  1. Santa killed Jesus HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

    Chalk up another win for a fat guy!!

    ReplyDelete
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    added- checkbox and from now on each time a comment is added I receive 4 emails
    with the same comment. Is there a means you are able to remove me from that service?
    Thanks!
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    ReplyDelete

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