Wednesday, July 4, 2012

That's Not A Knife. This is Knife. That's Not a BBW. This Is a BBW.
This is a knife!!
Not a knife

That's Not A Knife. This is Knife. That's Not a BBW. This Is a BBW.

Some people have a strange idea what a BBW is. What a BBW was 30 years ago and what one is now has changed dramatically. If a fat guy is able to pork a woman then she is NOT I repeat NOT a BBW.
Crocodile Dundee explaining to his squeeze and a thug what a knife is.
Mick he has a knife! That's not a knife, this is a knife. Let's turn this into a teaching moment. I, Fat Bastard will be presenting some BBW, Plumpers, Chubs, SSBBW's Pork Beast and Land Whales as a way to clear up the misconception as to what a BBW really is.

This is a plumper. If she is still porkable by most fat guys and  has a waist and minimal ham arms, it's a PLUMPER!

This is a Chub. If a fat guy can pork it it's a Chub. If its tits stick out as far as its gut it's a Chub
This is a BBW. Most fat guys would have a tough time porking her. There are probably chronic yeast infections and yeasty fat folds.

This one could go either way. Some experts may describe this as a land whale pup
This is a pork beast. Only the most dedicated fat admirer could get with this. Pork beasts become gender ambiguous. Their tits often resemble man boobs and many of them are diesel and bull dykes. Be afraid! Be very afraid! These pork beasts cause more buried penis syndrome than a grade 5 panniculus  aka meat skirt.
This is a atypical pork beast or a fat drag queen. Notice the beginning of a split pannus aka meat skirt. This big bellied babe has a meat face and a meat skirt.
This is an SSBBW. The distinction between SSBBW and land whale has always been a subject for heated debate. Land whales often travel in pods and see skinny guys and buffets as their krill. There is no way a fat guy can pork an SSBBW!
These are land whales. They are in a pod and they are either saying "We're number one" Land whales can be very confident,  They are saying their combined weigh is 1 ton or they want one more box of Twinkies.

I hope this clear things up.

Now for some more images.
Land whales foraging.
SSBBW getting liquored up and ready for her fat admirer
Land whale? BBW? SSBBW? Or in transition?

Now for something to soothe the eyes!


  1. James the ButlerJuly 4, 2012 at 11:20 PM


    I must say that this is your most excellent post in quite some time, Mr. Bastard. You clearly understand human female obesity and its various degrees. I must say that Chub is quite the ravishing young lady, and the Plumper as well. The BBW is hot, and the SSBBW is borderline, and just barely within the realm of bangability for me, in terms of desire. The others, except for the pork beasts, I would gladly allow to fellate me. The SSBBW has achieved the Triple Stack, which is difficult for most fat women to achieve, and therefore very erotic. With training, she could reach the quad-stack quite easily, and at that point she would become hyper sexualized, in my professional opinion as a butler.

    Belly Boy is on vacation at the moment, and so I shall be filling in for him. He is visiting Thailand with Big Lard Ass and is planning on going on what he calls "an eating adventure." Big Lard Ass plans to learn new sexual techniques while he is there.

    A BBW who takes good care of herself, dresses well, is clean, and has a good personality, can still be a good woman to have relations with (indeed, the fat makes her tighter!!) and in some instances even girlfriend or wife material, even if you are not a Fat Admirer.

  2. Belly Boy is in Thailand? Good for Belly Boy. I know how much he loves skinny Asian chicks. I, Fat Bastard, only bone skinny chicks because they do all the work and are usually yeast free. I hate getting jock itch or yeast in my fat folds.

    She laid on her back and said, "Fat Bastard eat me please."
    I said, "I'm on a strict diet. I ain't allowed no cheese."

    While I was stationed in Korea I visited a lot of whore houses. Those skinny ho's would do the basket trick. You'd lay on your back and they would be in a hanging basket above you. Another ho would wind up the basket rope and the basket would spin with the ho in it. When your tallywacker is inside a hot Asian ho's hey nani nani and it's spinning... all I can say is wow.

    James, you sound like a faithful and loyal servant to Belly Boy. Your insight as a servant serving the fat and regal is most welcome her on Bigger Fatter Politics.

    Proud FA has porked 100's if not 1000's of BBWs and SSBBW. He is one tough hombre whose motto is, "NO MUFF TO TOUGH". He has a lot of stamina and he can burn down several BBWs and SSBBW's per night.

    I have learned volumes from Dr Gerald Teddy Bear on body types and I am expanding upon his body of work. The has been for a long time a great need for clarification, refinement and standardization of fat body nomenclature.

    Give Belly Boy and Rev LardAss my best and again think you for taking such good care of Belly Boy. OINK!

    1. Belly Boy is in Thailand as we speak. I have been in contact with him via Skype and e-mail, and he seems to be in good spirits. He required an entire 3-seat row all to himself, and two belt extenders while flying. He told me that he was able to convince them to provide him with triple meals, since BLA paid for him to have 3 seats. BLA was in the aisle seat next to Belly Boy, who was flying in the center row.

      Belly Boy is traveling to Thailand in part for sight-seeing, but also to undergo a certain medical procedure that is currently illegal in the United States at this time. BLA is in it for the sight-seeing and for the women, who he is capable of seducing most easily. Belly Boy is also interested in the possibility of exploring relations with a special kind of woman that is somewhat common in Thailand, and that most men would tend to shy away from, but Belly Boy is a glutton not just for food, but for many of life's pleasures.

      I myself am taking this as a much-needed vacation from my normal duties, and have been lounging about poolside whilst imbibing various intoxicating beverages.

    2. The flight crew must have been in awe having the majestic Belly Boy on the plane. I think that when someone can take up three seats they should fly for free just like as someone who can finish a Quadruple ByPass Burger or weighs over 350 pounds eats free and the Heart Attack Grill.

      I am curious about the medical procedure Belly Boy is having. I hope all goes well.

      As to the women who will be servicing Belly Boy I suspect they will be the famous Thai lady boys who look more like women than most American women.

      While it must be an honor being a Belly Boy's Butler and gentleman's gentleman the demands can caring for the super super super super obese can be tiring. Belly Boy is like a finely tuned machine requiring much care and maintenance. Enjoy your respite.

  3. James the ButlerJuly 8, 2012 at 10:48 PM

    Belly Boy is having an experimental surgery, the details of which I am afraid he has instructed me to keep private at this time. I have received an update, and he has had the procedure, which took 11 hours due to several complications, but he is doing well. It has been a very traumatic ordeal but it looks like he is going to be fine.

    Prior to his operation, he did send me some pictures of himself with various peniled Asian women. I am encouraging him to have an HIV test once he returns to the United States, as Belly Boy is fiercely anti-condom. BLA, on the other hand, has informed me that he has been with several women and has used a condom each time, and he has insisted upon inspecting these women's loins to ensure that they are not peniled. It is the only way to know for sure.

    I must say that this vacation has had me growing restless. I do so miss caring for Belly Boy, but I shall try to find other means to occupy my time. I am looking into some additional training in Britain.

  4. I am worried about Belly Boy and his surgery. Certainly he is in better hands with Thai doctors than American ones but they have far less experience with SUPER DUPER sized patients like Belly Boy.

    Generally men don't get HIV from sex unless they are getting it up the poop shoot. Since Belly Boy is so fat the chance of a lady boy getting her lady cream into Belly Boy's rectum are slim. If he's the one doing the boning he is not at as much risk as if he were getting porked in the ass.

    My motto is... go for the blow job. I have never been one for taking the Hershey Highway unless I am wearing a condom.

    I good friend of mine had a friend who was stationed in Korea. He came back to the US and was diagnosed with Hong Kong Dong. The VA doctor looked at his dick and said, "You have Hong Kong Dong and it will have to be amputated." He went to a private doctor and that doctor told him the same thing so he went to see an Asian doctor in San Fransisco, a doctor Wang Hung Lo MD a specialist in Hong Kong Dong and other penile disorders. He told Dr Wang, "I have been to 2 other that I have Honk Kong Dong and that my dong will have to be amputate" at which Dr Wang burst out laughing saying, "Amputate? Amputate? Ridiculous.... dong will fall off all by self!"

    I too miss Belly Boy's comments and his BOOM SHAKKA LAKKAs where he busts a fat rhyme. It must be worse for you his faithful servant having him gone for so long but I have a suggestion. Organize a coming home party for him. Make all his favorite food and hire some strippers and other hos. Cook up some Belly Burgers as he will be wanting some Western food.

    Give Belly Boy my best and tell him OINK!

  5. Are you guys serious?

    1. We are a serious as a fat man's heart attack.

  6. Fat Bastard and James the Butler have pencil dicks.

  7. Christopher ThomasAugust 21, 2014 at 8:25 PM

    skinny girls look like sickly, aids infested, heroin banging, aliens.They are sick in the mind. they have been brainfucked by idiots who tell them that having back ribs is sexy, ask any ethiopian woman if they feel sexy.... not only that they are the MINORITY and not the norm.
    A REAL SEXY WOMAN is one that feels sexy after finishing a steak and not throwing it up 4 minutes later.

  8. This is a prime example of lean hatred. Slender women are better in every category. First of all fat guys like me can can't pork most fat girls but we can bone slender women. Most slender women don't have eating disorders.

    Slender women are exceptional in every way and not part of the mind herd.

    Slender women are more attractive and more womanly.

    Slender women eat normal amounts of food and rarely eat beef so when they fart it's not as stinky.

    Slender women have less yeast infections.

    Slender women make better mothers.


After you leave a comment EAT!