Golden Uterus Syndrome

It goes without saying; fat girls are sluts and most men like sluts but not all sluts are created equal. Many fat girl sluts are sly manipulators and add to that the fact desperation turns fat girls into sluts they can become doubly dangerous. Fat girls are far more likely to get knocked up and they are also far more likely to had an STD. Before you go spelunking into the treacherous yeast cave of a fat girl PUT A HELMET ON THAT SOLDIER!

Put a helmet on that soldier stick boy!

Fat girls love being mommas for many reasons. First off they absolutely love the attention. They get treated as though spreading their legs and catching the worm is like finding the cure for cancer. Fat girls love the adoration. They love the many trips to the OBGYN for their obesity related high risk pregnancies. They like all the free stuff like WIC, baby showers, welfare, free rent, and child support and all they had to do was lay on their backs and spread their legs. Many fat girls are too fat to pork doggie style and cowgirl position can cause serious injury and possible death.

HELP! HELP!! SOMEBODY CALL 911!!!

If you get a fat girl knocked up she's going to own your ass. She will drag your sorry ass into family court and get hit you up for child support and you will be paying for years and the kid may not even be yours. Fat girls are sluts.

I hear you all now saying, "But Fat Bastardo, not all bitches with golden uterus are fat and not all sluts are fat." This is true and not all fat girls are sluts but most of them are. They are all most certainly food sluts. Skinny girls can be sluts but are they the type of slut that will get knocked up in order to trap a guy? Probably not. Skinny women want to find a nice guy who will respect them and not just act as a sperm donor. This is why I, Fat Bastardo, encourage skinny women to consider a fat man for a mate. Jack Sprat can have the fat girl and Fat Jack can have the hot skinny woman. Fat men are more faithful and if the skinny wife bangs other guys a fat man won't really care but skinny chicks are far less likely to even think about straying. Skinny chick have low self-esteem while fat girls low standards. Fat girls figure that skinny guys can really throw the dick and while this may be true skinny women know that the thicker the hide the better the ride.

In this image the skinny wife has just finished her stint on the treadmill and is now going to the kitchen to get her tubby hubby some real candy crush.