Mark Kuhn Third Party Candidate

While it is too soon for Bigger Fatter Politics to endorse a candidate we do like the guts of that big fat loud mouthed lummox Chris Christie and now we are liking what independent candidate Mark Kuhn a nationally renowned guitarist and composer from Asheville NC has to say. We particularly like the fact that candidate Mark Kuhn wants to legalize the sticky green (medical marijuana) for medicinal purposes only (wink wink) and wants to raise the tax rate on corporate gangsters to a whopping 200%! When I told the Chef, a proud man of color, he was so thrilled that he decided to throw all this weight behind in Kuhn candidacy after I told him that Kuhn was not spelled coon.

You may recall that our Internet reporter Rotunda Hindenburg once launched blistering journalistic flabbalance on Kuhn for not hiring fat go go girls for his surf band  Voodoo Court but after reviewing concert footage we now know that fat girls would not be able to keep up with the frenetic dancing required of a surf band go go girl and even if they could the stage be doused in a huge puddle of sweat and Mark and his band mates would need breakout the skim boards and life vests. We now approve of his decision to use lean and attractive dancers and while this is not an endorsement we think that Mark Kuhn could make a splendid POTUS and the lovely Mrs Kuhn would make a  great FLOTUS.

Currently Kuhn has no party affiliation. The Chef has asked him to join the Pot Party (formerly known as the Sticky Green Party and Ashley's Roach Clip's United Heads for Hemp) a budding off shoot of the Green Party while Governor Christie is pressuring him to join the   Pizza Party. We would encourage him to join Pat Paulsen's STAG Party Straight Talkin American Government.

Scroll down and listen to candidate Kuhn's campaign song If I Were President.