Peace Through Prosperity Gluttony
Make Pie Not War!
Fat people are simply too fat and lazy to fight.
Fighting is too much work! Why fight when you can be enjoying your favorite fast food?
There is not one single fatling in this crowd. That's the problem. Fat = Sedate. Build MeccaDonalds all over the Middle East and watch the Muslims feast!
It's all about promoting
tolerance and not lactose intolerance. When it comes to promotion
McDonald is the world leader. The Mecca of fast food could be Mecca!
Instead of Muslims making a pilgrimage to Mecca and getting all whipped
up and angry they'll be hopping on their camels and galloping down to
their local Mikey D's to get fat and apathetic content just like us.
By Fat Bastard
We all know what the sanctions
in the Treaty of Versailles did when inflicted upon war torn Germany
after WW-1. When you impede a human being's natural greed they get
really pissed off and end up doing bad things. The Treaty of Versailles
did not punish the Bismarkians but it instead punished the German people
or at least that is what is argued by some historians. Germany was
hurting economically before WW-2. This was one of the factors that
allowed the Nazi party to come to power.
Fat, Content and Jolly Sergeant Shultz |
A Caesar Salad
Let me have men about me that are fat,
Sleek-headed men and such as sleep a-nights.
Yond Cassius has a lean and hungry look,
He thinks too much; such men are dangerous.
Let me have men about me that are fat,
Sleek-headed men and such as sleep a-nights.
Yond Cassius has a lean and hungry look,
He thinks too much; such men are dangerous.
Cassius
appeared to Caesar like an underfed anorexic chick bent on stealing a
fat girl's boyfriend. His "lean and hungry look" unsettled Julius
Caesar, who preferred the company of fat, contented men—who wouldn't
bite the hand that feeds them. Cassius looks like he's been up late
nursing his envy, a situation that bodes ill for the dictator.
I'm sure you are all thinking now, "OK Fat Bastard, how does this apply to modern times?"
Nuke Leftovers NOT People!
Secretary
of State Hillary Clinton needs to get her skinny ass back in the
kitchen and feed Bill! Have you seen how skinny Bubba is these days?
It's appalling. Instead of Hillary going over to the Middle East and
trying to broker a peace with those crazy goat humping baby raping
Mooslims we need to send these folks FOOD. Bring some Krispy Creme
donunts next time you negotiate with Mahmoud AhMADineJihad.
Food
is not only the language of love but it is the language of peace. Food
transcends all language. When people are making yummy sounds they're
not in the mood to quarrel and the fatter they get the hungrier they
are and the more often they will eat and the more yummy sounds they
will make. YUM! I say fatten up all the Muslims at Gtimo and before you know it they will be begging for bacon double cheese burgers and giving up valuable information to get them!
Make Pie Not War!
Let's
crunch some numbers. It costs over 100 million dollars just to kill
one Taliban asshole. That's insane! Put a few hundred fast food
restaurants in Afganistan. Make some McGoat Burgers or some Camel
Humpin Fries and serve them at a price any Taliban moron can afford. I
can see it now. Instead of those ass-lifters shouting Allah Akbar (God
is Great) as they cut off some infidel's head they will be shouting
McDonalds Akbar! (McDonald's is great!) Compared to the crap they eat
once they get a taste of fast food, McDonalds will have them eating a
McSausage Pig Burgers.
Sure
there will be some fundamentalist holdouts but for them I say send
them some Moon Pies. After all, they do worship that silly Pagan Moon
god. Put some ice cream on it it and call it Pie Allah Mode. They'll
love it.
Here's a sample menu:
Sharia Shakes (beaten like a Muslim wife)
Haddith Hash Brown (made with opiated hashish)
Mohammad Burgers
(goat meat patties served by a 9 year old girl... like the kind Rush Limbaugh fucks when
he's in the Dominican Republic on a sex tour or like Mohammad's wife
Aisha)
Fedayeen Fries (after eating them you will martyr yourself for no reason)
Jihad Dogs (made with real dog meat)
Hamas Hot Cakes (made with yellow cake uranium)
Iraq of Lamburgers
Fat people are simply too fat and lazy to fight.
Fighting is too much work! Why fight when you can be enjoying your favorite fast food?
There is not one single fatling in this crowd. That's the problem. Fat = Sedate. Build MeccaDonalds all over the Middle East and watch the Muslims feast!
He who lives by the fork shall not die by the sword!
(Maybe we should nuke Mecca?)
Why would you want to chop some poor slob's head off when you can sink your choppers into this bad boy? |
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance!
All we are saying is give peas a chance! All we are saying is give peas a chance!