Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Happy New Year?


The end of glutton season is coming to an end. It won't be until Valentine's Day they we can be pigging out on chocolate candy. With glutton season officially ending for us gluttons it continues for the corporate gluttons who greedily stole trillions from Americans and other citizens of the world.

2013 will be more of the same. I don't know what's can happen with fiscal cliff but I don't know there are a lot of Republicans who need to control off the fiscal cliff and onto a bed of pointed bamboo sticks. The last I heard is that the Senate overwhelmingly approved the majority of the presidents plan but that evil piece of trash Mitch McConnell is his Dick so far up Congressman Boehner's drunken ass that this rescue of the American people may not happen and if that's the case I would like to see a lot of Republicans pushed off of cliffs, pushed off bridges and pushed out of moving vehicles for the traitors that they are.

I hope it will be a happy new year. I hope that we get our fiscal house in order. I hope that we restore the Bill of Rights. I hope that we overthrow the shadow government and execute of the filthy rich traitors.

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I have some predictions for the new year:

I predict at least 20 mass shootings.

I predict tighter gun laws that will do little to stop medicated people from shooting up malls movie theaters churches and schools.

I predict a dramatic rise in obesity rate among adults and I predict a leveling off for children.

I predict the resignation of several Republican leaders because of sex scandals involving children. I didn't need to look at my crystal ball to see this one coming.

I predict the assassination of some corporate gangsters in Europe and possibly the US.

Now for some happy predictions

I predict even lower restaurant prices!

I predict the return of the Hostess Twinkie!

I predict the belly boy will marry a beautiful Asian lady boy.

I predict that McDonald's will come out with the McTruck that will be used much like food trucks that are used to sell tacos. These are also known as roach coaches. I further predict that Taco Bell will be offering a delivery service.

I predict that cheesecake factory will be selling his products in convenience stores.

I predict that Sen. Mitch McConnell will die of the summer.

I predict that Rush Limbaugh will die from the fecal impaction all doing his show.

I predict that the old fat acceptance movement will lose 50% of its members.

I predict the tea party will teabag Donald Trump and he'll like it.


Now for some New Year's resolutions.

I resolved to eat more pork products.

I resolved to bone more skinny chicks.

I resolved to petition Krispy Kreme to return to using trans fats.



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