Fat Singers Are The Best Singers

Fat Singers are the BEST Singers

Who's better than Ann Wilson from the legendary Canadian rock band Heart? Susan Boyle? Maybe and Susan Boyle is also fat. Who can forget Ann's name sake Carney Wilson of Wilson Phillips? Then we have the immortal Mama Cass and the Queen of Soul Aretha Frankin. What thinling can sing better than any of them? Barbara Streisand you say? Babs to is now fat and she really is like butter. Another great under rated singer was the late great Nell Carter. Nell was an SSBBW and boy could that fat girl sing! We mustn't forget Jordin Sparks the latest target for MeMe Roth's venom. While still only a pup, Jordin has the potential to surpass greats like Mama Cass, and the plump Patti LaBelle and dare I say the Queen of Soul herself, Aretha Franklin. Keep eating Jordin and grow your waist and butt along with your career.

Ann Wilson is more that twice as big as her hot thinling sister Nancy and she sings twice as good. Can you think of another female rocker better that Ann Wilson? Of course you can't!

You can have your Dixie Chicks, Lorretta Lynn, Shania Twain ect.. ect.. ect.. but when in comes to country music no one come close to Wynona Judd. With a name like Wynona she has to be fat.


Gorgeous girl glutton Wynona flashing the sign of the fork.

So impressed with Wynona, Primus bass play Les Claypool penned the following lyric.

Wynona's got herself a big brown beaver
And she shows it off to all her friends.
One day, you know, that beaver tried to leave her,
So she caged him up with cyclone fence.
Along came Lou with the old baboon
And said Recognize that smell?
Smells like seven layers,
That beaver eats Taco Bell.

Now Rex he was a Texan out of New Orleans
And he traveled with the carnival shows.
He ran bumper cars, sucked cheap cigars
And he candied up his nose.
He got wind of the big brown beaver
So he though he'd take himself a peek,
But the beaver was quick and he grabbed him by the kiwis
Now he ain't pissed for a week.
(And a half!)

Now Wynona took her big brown beaver,
And she stuck him up in the air.
Said I sure do love this big brown beaver
And I wish I did have a pair.
Now the beaver once slept for seven days
And it gave us all an awful fright.
So I tickled his chin and I gave him a pinch
And the bastard tried to bite me.
Wynona loved her big brown beaver
And she stroked him all the time.
She pricked her finger one day and it occurred to her
She might have a porcupine

Jordin Sparks may be a mere pup now but Aretha was even smaller when she first hit the charts and with today's glutton fare so available and with the enabling and normalization of gluttony and obesity Jordin stands a very good chance of weighing as much as Aretha and Wynona combined! EAT! EAT! EAT! EAT! You can do it! The good news is, Jordin Sparks is FAT!

OK I have to admit it. There are exceptions to the rule. Barbara Streisand did look better thin and she sang great even when she was a hot thinling.

 Like butter, Babs beginning her blimp phase but still just a pup.


Babs breaking into full blimp mode.


Beautiful Babs Before Blimping


Bigger is better! Not only is Aretha the Queen of Soul but she is also the queen of soul food and singing better than ever!


Aretha, as pretty as you were then you are even better now!

What tribute to fat girl singers would be complete without mentioning Mama Cass. Not only did Mama Cass have the greatest voice in folk rock she died while eating a sandwich.


Look at that impressive tonal neck blubber!


I can see it now. Her handlers are going to slim her down instead of plumping her up. I fear that is what is in store for Susan Boyle. If Susan Boyle loses the weight she will lose her voice. It's true!


A young undiscovered Susan Boyle. If she had come to the US she would have added the thick tonal blubber that now sets her voice apart from the pack.



Look at her now! Look at the food on her upper lip!! Look at that tone enhancing neck blubber!!!

As always on Bigger Fatter Blog it's ladies first but let's not forget the men.



There may be some debate as to who the greatest opera singer of all time was, Luciano Pavaratti or Enrico Caruso.  I gotta go with Pavaratti. As fat as he was more than a few women in Italy and the rest of the world flicked their switches when ever Pavaratti took the stage and unleashed the awesome power of his legendary tenor voice. Even though he was a fat pasta eating lummox he got more ass than most rock stars.

Per i nostri lettori italiani: Pavaratti scopata donne più belle di Mick Jagger. Non era un nano e lui non è andato sul palco e muovere il culo magro come un omosessuale.

Michael Jackson may be the king of pop but the best voice in pop belongs to the meat master general himself, the immortal man of meat, Meatloaf! With all due respect to Michael Jackson, all the crotch grabbing in the world will never match the power of the meat!  

 
Mighty Mighty Meatloaf majestically meting out the musical meat!


Even his name is great! Ruben (sandwich the stud) Studdard wowed even the hyper critical Simon Cowel to win American Idol and defeat that classless sweet boy Clay (my ass is) Aiken. The last pussy Aiken saw was when he slithered out of his mama. Our man Ruben is getting more ass than a toilet seat and speaking of getting ass no two men are responsible for setting the mood for seduction than Barry White and his Love Unlimited Orchestra and the late great Luther Vandross.


The deep soulful tones of Barry's voice along with the romantic musical arrangements of his Love Unlimited Orchestra put millions of ladies in the mood to make sweet love with men like me, Fat Bastard. Rev BLA and our latest contributor and gourmet The Chef.


The only thinling soul singers who can hold a candle to Luther is Smokey Robinson and Wilson Picket and maybe Al Green and maybe Marvin Gaye.


When it comes to singing the blues, the clear winner is BB King. Muddy Waters, Blind Lemon Jefferson, Bobby Blue Bland, Slim Harpo, Robert Cray, and even Robert Johnson are all a close second to BB King. BB,big blubber puts him over the top.


Hunka hunka burning love! The king of rock rocked! There is no arguing that the skinny Elvis was great but he would have been a mere flash in the pan and overshadowed by Jerry Lee Lewis, Chubby Checker and Fats Domino had Elvis Aaron Presley remained a thinling. The fatter the King got, the more women swooned.

Elvis died on the toilet from an fecal impacted bowel. His drug use and power eating caused the King to die in a manner worthy of a fatling. He will be remembered as much for his majestic fatling death and for his bigger than life life.

There is no telling how big the King could have and would have become if he had a hot thinling nurse around to give him an enema to release that hunka hunka steaming poop.

You ain't nothin but a pig/dog chowin all the time!

The best Elvis impersonators portray an Elvis as if he were alive today..... OR is this really the King  pretending to be an Elvis impersonator? Hmm....???


You probably don't even recognize this runt. This is the once great John Popper of the legendary Blues Traveler. When John Popper and Blues Traveler were topping the charts with smash hits like Run Around and the Heart Brings You Back John was a big fat sweating lummox but since his weight loss John and the band are no longer selling out arenas. His singing is not as good and neither is his harmonica playing. Like most fat boys John developed his educated harmonica playing tongue eating pussy but now that he's skinny he's probably throwing the dick into his groupies and dropping even more weight.


John Popper and Blues Traveler in their heyday

Let's recap. Who's HOT and who's NOT? 

Ann Wilson and Heart = Hot enough to warm a Canadian winter! 

Meatloaf after his weight loss = NOT!

Aretha Frankin = Still HOT!

Ruben Studdard = HOT pastrami on dark rye! 

BB King = No sign of cooling!

Wynona = Sizzling like country ham!

Barry White = The body heat generated by his career IS the real reason the polar ice caps are melting. 

Luther Vandross = The Spanish fly of music with a French tickler.  

John Popper NOT!




There you have it folks; some of the great fat singers. Please feel free make other suggestions but I think I've covered it pretty well and as always think you for reading Bigger Fatter Blog the leader in fat acceptance. EAT!

Obesity In Africa

 

OINK!

George W Obama

'George W. Obama' isn't a very comfortable look for the president

Karl Rove's in his corner, but Al Gore isn't. So if Barack Obama looks in the mirror, or on the Internet, and doesn't recognize himself, it's no wonder. This creepy mashup of "George W. Obama" went viral after the Huffington Post posted it on the site's front page in the wake of revelations that communications companies have been sharing Americans' phone records with the National Security Agency. And for once, there's more outrage from the left (the ACLU called it "Orwellian") than the right, where a critic like former White House press secretary Ari Fleischer cackles that the president is "vindicating Bush." Obama's plea that "we're going to have some problems here" without trust seems to be true. It looks as if he has one. [Source]

You may be asking... Hey Fat Bastard where is the fat angle here other than the intelligence industrial complex getting fatter? I'm glad you asked. Al Gore is fat as hell and he's waded in on this.

Al Gore: NSA Phone Records Collecting ‘Obscenely Outrageous’

Posted by Gaby T, June 11, 2013

Al Gore had some harsh words for the Obama administration in response to the news,first reported by The Guardian on Wednesday, that the National Security Agency had been secretly collecting millions of Verizon customers’ phone records for the past few months.

The former vice president slammed the overreach of the NSA’s surveillance powers on Twitter.
While Gore is best known for his work on climate change, he has also expressed his concern about threats to privacy rights in the past.
Earlier this year at South By Southwest, Gore decried a creeping government culture of surveillance.

“The government is about to complete this $2 billion facility in Utah that can sweep up everything” from phone calls to emails,: Gore said, according to tech news website Slashdot. “And the Supreme Court just ruled you can’t sue.”

Gore was also outspoken when the media revealed that the Bush administration had been engaging in warrantless wiretapping. The practice “virtually compels the conclusion that the president of the United States has been breaking the law repeatedly and persistently,” Gore said in a speech in 2006,

The New York Times reported.
via June 06 News: Al Gore: NSA Phone Records Collecting ‘Obscenely Outrageous’ | Huffington Post

A Guide for Gainers and Losers: The Real Science

 

 A Food Journal For Gainers and Losers

Most fatlings are freestyle gainers. By that I mean they don't really have an eating plan or any method for the accounting of calories. Wannabe fatling gainers could optimize their gaining efforts if they were to simply keep a food journal. By doing so they could eliminate nutrient dense foods such as fresh fruits and vegetables which are appetite killers and substitute with calorie laden foods foods like cheese, ice cream, butter, Doritos, and a wide variety of chips and dips. The dedicated gaining glutton can optimize his or her gaining simply by keeping a food journal. At the end of the day they can review that journal to see how well they've done and look for ways of improvement for the next day so that they can more efficiently ingest a larger amount of calories without ingesting space taking high fiber foods.

Eating calorie laden foods can also help to eliminate cravings for fruits and vegetables. I shudder to think of a fatling eating a lettuce salad with raspberry vinaigrette. This does not mean that an occasional trip to the salad bar is a bad idea but if you must go to the salad bar the wise glutton piles on the cheese, bacon bits and high-fat dressings. The wisest glutton seeks to eliminate vegetation altogether and ops for fat laden meats, cheese and sugary treats.

A good gainer needs the right tools and one of those tools the fast food pyramid. When it comes to gaining, fast food is always a best bet. Fast food is quick, cheap, easy and satisfying. Fast food is a lot of food.

Many people in the size acceptance movement advocate a method of eating called health at every size or HAES. HAES was created and popularized by Linda Bacon. (sometimes satire just writes itself) The problem with HAES is that it's too confusing, especially for fat girls. Dr. Rev. Big Lard Ass coinvented the Grazen-Heimer technique along with Nobel Prize winning scientists Otto Grazen PhD and Hans Heimer PhD. Their pioneering work has led to a layman's version of the Grazen-Heimer technique. In fact there are two methods based on Grazen-Heimer. The first one is called FATT or food all the time and the other one is called EATT or eat all the time. Recently these two techniques due to their many similarities have been combined into a technique called EATT FATT. Because fat fattens best gainers are reminded to get at least 75% of the calories from fat which is much like the South Beach diet and the Atkins diet.

Gaining for Gainers.   Simplicity is key and Adherence is a must.

The successful gainer simply needs to do two things and and those two things are this. Follow the fast food pyramid and simply eat all the time with the goal of an incremental increase in calories every day. Simple adherence to the simple plan will quickly propel a portly pig into mega pig like proportions by simply eating pig like portions.

Some advocates of gaining stress the need for a sedentary lifestyle and well theory this makes sense there are several serious drawbacks to this approach. If a gainer is going for weight it is important to note that muscle weighs far more than fat. The other important factor is that activity increases appetite and it aids in digestion which speeds the transport of food from the mouth to the poop chute. Eventually the gainer will become more and more sedentary as a weight increases but starting with a good base of muscle under all that fat will increase weight and increase appetite. Too many gainers and other fatlings seemed to plateau at the paltry 400 pound mark. 400 pounds is merely a good starting point.

The Mechanics of Gaining Eat a lot eat often.

Unless you're talking there is no reason to stop eating and even if you are talking you can still talk with food in your mouth. If you're not eating your food you should be drinking your food. Eat that donut but not without a double latte. Eat that burger but not without a triple thick shake and french fries saturated in grease and covered with melted cheese and gravy. It's almost obscene to eat french fries that are not smothered in cheese and covered in gravy. Remember you are a glutton so act like a glutton and be uncouth.

Your journal will contain pages similar to a Daytimer and currently our engineers are working on an app for iPad called the Gaining App/food journal. Essentially the gaining journal is a series of pages listing the days of the weeks, months of the year and hours and minutes in the day. Every time you eat you write down in the journal what you ate at its caloric content. At the end of the day will calculate the number of calories you eat in for the day compared with your basal metabolic rate. The app will calculate your  metabolic rate and total energy expenditure for that day in real-time and if you have not exceeded your metabolic rate the app will prompt you to eat some more. The app contains pictures of food and printable coupons for great deals on fast food. Every day you will set a goal to exceed your metabolic rate by a certain percentage. This is the key to sustained and progressive gaining. The aim of this method is to incrementally increase your caloric intake. This is the most natural way of gaining. The days of the feeding tube are coming to an end and feeders who want to be successful need to become encouragers. There is still a place for the feeding tube but it is losing its prominence and should only be used in emergency situations.

 

A Guide for Losing for Losers. How to eat your way lean.

Yes, you read that right. The best way to get lean is to eat your way lean. You may be asking why a fat acceptance site would promote leanness. There are a lot of angry fat girls who really don't want to be fat. They whine and cry and bitch and moan and are otherwise a major pain in the ass. There always pissed off about something and that something is the fact that they are fat. They simply cannot or will not accept the fact that they are fat so they try to make everybody else except it but the truth is most people don't give a shit if they are fat. Most people just want these mouthy fat girls to simply shut the fuck up. This is for them and other land whales and pork beasts who for whatever silly reason want to abandon the fat lifestyle.

A good way to remain fat is to remain ignorant when it comes to basic nutrition. Blissful ignorance is the key to remaining fat. The less you know the better. Since most people who want to lose weight are fat girls I will present numbers that are appropriate for facts. The USDA recommends the average woman who is moderately active consume 2000 cal per day. If a woman eats 2000 cal a day the most weight she can maintain is about 135 pounds. As you can see it takes a lot of serious eating to even get into the 200 pound range. With today's food scape it's pretty easy to get a lot of calories in the foods you eat. Luckily for the gaining glutton today's food has an engineer especially for gaining and maintaining. This does not put the loser in good stead for losing and maintaining a low body weight and lean body mass.

Eat less and move more... but eat MORE food!

Eating less calories and burning more calories than you consume will result in weight loss. A lot of fat girl dieters like to try to deny this as they retreat back into their angry fat girl mindset and the lies of the old fat acceptance movement. Fat girls who don't want to be fat still love food so it behooves them to either like being fat or change their palates and their appetites.

An enemy to the gainer is a friend to the loser.

One of the biggest enemies the gainer is dietary fiber. Fiber, when it enters a digestive system, becomes a space hog. Eating a diet high in fiber combined with a lot of water can cause a gainer to feel full. The reason that they feel full is because they are full but they are full of extremely low-calorie food. It could be an hour or more before the stomach empties and they're hungry again. A gainers biggest mistake can be the loser's greatest triumph. Perhaps the biggest enemy to the gainer is lean protein. Lean protein can spell disaster for a gainer. Lean protein causes the stomach to release a hormone called CKK when it comes to appetite CKK is a kill switch. When the CKK hormone kicks in it's like a punch to the gut from Heavyweight boxer Iron Mike Tyson. You won't want to eat for hours. CKK mediates a number of physiological processes, including digestion and satiety.

Here is a sample page of the food journal.

Sunday

12 AM  Midnight Snack  3 slices of  pizza extra cheese and sausage 400 calories 16 oz  creme soda 200 calories.

_______________________________________________________________________

12:15 AM _________________________________________________________________ 
_______________________________________________________________________

12:30 AM _________________________________________________________________ 
_______________________________________________________________________
12:45 AM _________________________________________________________________ 
_______________________________________________________________________
1 AM _____________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________


Skip to breakfast

9:00 AM Fried eggs, 4 slices Texas toast, 1/2 pound of  bacon, 6 links sausage, 12 oz OJ, 3 cups coffee extra cream and sugar, Total calories 2189___________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________


Mid morning snack

10:30 AM 4 Krispy Creme Donuts, Tripple Carmel Latte, Total calories 700____________
_________________________________________________________________________

Lunch

12:00 PM 3 double cheese burgers, Large Shake, Large fries, XL Coke, 4  hot apple pies Total calories  2900 ________________________________________________________________

Post Lunch Snack 1:30 PM 16 oz Mountain Dew, Bag of Doritos, candy bar Total calories 700
____________________________________________________________________________


I think you get the idea.

Eat your way fat or eat your way thin. By making substitutes a person hell-bent on getting to and maintaining a low body weight can do it with relative ease but by the same token again are can easily and steadily pack on the pounds and become a walking or rolling flabalanche he or she has always dreamed of being.

Should NSA Whistle Blower Edward Snowden Be Pardoned?

Sign the White House petition. 

I'm still trying to sort things out on this but at this point I smell a rat.

1. We have the CIA, the FBI, Interpol, the Department of Homeland Security, the Secret Service and others so why do we need the NSA spying on every single American?

2.  If the NSA program is actually effective in preventing terrorism how did two suspected terrorists pull off the Boston marathon bombing?

3. It has been known and widely reported since 2005 that the NSA has been recording every phone call any Internet activity of every American. Certainly the Muslim terrorist groups were aware of this. This being the case, this spying program has been compromised for the past eight years so what's the point of continuing it?

4. How is this not a blatant violation of the fourth amendment?

The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

In America they snarl and say, "I need to see some ID!" Before they beat you.

Nazi Germany They'd Say Papers Please

Ask Fat Bastard: Fat Bastard On Wives

I Fat Bastard have been known to give sage advice and as a result I get asked a lot of questions.

Jim asks: Why are married women heavier than single women? A: Single women come home, see what’s in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what’s in bed and go to the fridge.

Mark asks: What is love? A: The delusion that one woman differs from another. 

Rick asks: What worse than finding out your wife's got cancer? A: Finding out it's curable.

Grant asks: Why do wives like to have sex with the lights off? A: They can't stand to see their husbands have a good time!

Derek asks: Why do wives talk so much? A. Because they have two sets of lips.

Carlo asks: Why did God create lesbians? A: So feminists couldn't breed.

Mike asks: Why did God invent the yeast infection? A: So your wife could know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt.

Jerry asks:  Why do wives fake orgasms ? Because they think husbands care.

Tim asks: If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong? A: Made her chain too long.


Chuck asks: What is the definition of "making love"? A: Something your wife does while your fucking her.

Dean asks: What do 3 million abused women do wrong every year? A: They don't fucking listen.

Frank asks: Why do women close their eyes during sex? A: They can't stand to see a man having a good time.

George asks: Why do most men die before their wives? A: They want to!

Gilbert asks: What food diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%? A: Wedding Cake!

Dave asks: Why can't you trust your wife? A: How can you trust something that bleeds for five days and doesn't die?

Bill asks: What’s the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife? A: A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry.

Glen asks:  Do you know why wives fake orgasm? A: Because husbands fake foreplay.

Paul asks: What are the small bumps around a woman's nipples for? A: It's Braille for "suck here".

BELLY BOY GETTING POLITICAL: The American Caste System/The Belly Plan

Political analyst, glutton extraordinaire, food critic, author of the Belly Report, rap artist, globe trotter, social commentator and Internet reporter Belly Boy opines on the social/sexual changes and the need for a caste system due to the effects of the obesity bloom and growing foodist and gluttony movements.

 

Belly Boy's Skinny Body Double

BELLY BOY SPEAKS and People Listen!

by Belly Boy

 

Boom Shakka Lakka,
OINK OINK OINK
Boom Shakka Lakka,
BOINK BOINK BOINK!
Boom Shakka Lakka,
Move in with Jenna
Boom Shakka Lakka,
She'll make you sing like a tenor
Boom Shakka Lakka,
She's a FFA
BOOM SHAKKA LAKKA
Move in with her today!

I do see your point and every fat guy's point about women with low standards having some serious advantages. First, they don't care how fat you get or about money. They just need someone to provide emotional support and occasionally say insensitive things like "Yo, why don't you wear no tube tops no more?" And then if she wears them a lot you go "Yo, why you wear tube tops all the time? I bet not catch yo' ass cheating on me!"

A woman with high standards will expect you to have a good job, be reasonably fit, not be fat, be emotionally available, munch carpet, take her places, buy her things, etc. NO THANKS!! I ain't no skinny boy, I'm a BELLY BOY and FOOD IS MY JOY.

Promoting Low Standards is Key
 

We need to start figuring out a way to ensure that more skinny women have low standards, otherwise they will continue to breed with skinny guys and potentially breed a master weight class of thinlings that will potentially enslave the fat class or put us in fat internment camps. Us fat folks make awful slaves, but we are highly vulnerable because we are so dependent on food and porn, both regular, extra-skinny, and yes even SSBBW porn. I think that SSBBW porn should mainly be for thin men, and skinny women porn should be reserved for us fat men. This will encourage skinny men to bulk up, and fat women to slim down.

We do need some thinlings for the military, sports, etc, but they need to be placed under fat leadership. In other words, we need SSBHMs and SSBBWs in our elected government positions in order to keep the thinlings in check. As we continue to grow both in size and in numbers, the National Association for the Advancement of Eating Amazing Things (NAAEAT) will become a potent political force, with me as the head. We will advocate for all new Supreme Court Justices to be morbidly obese, and encourage existing ones to bulk up by adding more and better food to the Supreme Court Cafeteria.

A New American Caste System

We will promote a new caste system, defined not by race as in the 18th, 19th, and much of the 20th century, nor by wealth as during the 20th and first part of the 21st century. Instead, we will be based upon Body Mass Index. The fatter you are, the better. However, my plan also leaves open the chance for athletic women who are technically obese but actually aren't fat. These women will make excellent lovers for our fat male population, buoyed by doctor-prescribed steroids. This will increase their libidos, allowing each to service multiple fat men.

We will also allow and encourage non-steroid, non-obese women; however they will not be allowed in any leadership positions. These are for fat men and fat women only. Also steroid women because technically they are considered fat under my regime, but only on a technicality.

Jenna Talia will be able to have her pick of morbidly obese men to choose from. We will also ask her for advice on how to encourage more non-fat women to lust after obese men.

BELLY BOY, GETTING POLITICAL